Wednesday, March 31, 2010

State of the Union

In her role as a card-carrying, latte-leftist union delegate, Prudence does a spot of organising from time to time.

Prudence to colleague J: So, what you're telling me is, when you used to be a union member, you resented others who didn't pay dues getting a free ride?

J: Yes.

Prudence: And now you feel you have no need to rejoin the union as you're getting a free ride on the people who do pay their union dues?

J: Yes.

Prudence: And you don't find that the teensiest bit hypocritical?

J: No, I think I've earned it.

Prudence shook her head, as there wasn't much to say in the face of that.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Midsomer wit

Elderly vicar to Tom Barnaby: Blind Melon Jeffrey changed my life, you know.

Barnaby: Oh, yes?

Vicar: Oh yes - his use of contrapuntal rhythms put me onto madrigals.

Barnaby: Yeeeees, a lot of people say that.

Prudence loves a vignette.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Paying attention

Prudence, to taxi driver: "Can you take me home to this street, that suburb, please?

Taxi driver: "Do you know where it is?"

Prudence:"Yes, I live there."

Taxi driver: "Oh."

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Self-evident truths

Plastic is poisonous and evil.

Why then, if your cherry tomatoes are already in a plastic box, would you put said box inside a plastic bag, then another plastic bag?

Prudence finds going to the market an exercise in extreme self-control. It doesn't do to take other shoppers by the shoulders and shake them. No matter how much they deserve it.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Tobermory, Tomsk et al.

Prudence's friend B and his brother T have a wonderfully absurd take on life.

So when T asked B to take care of some stuff he was having sent over from the UK, B had to ask what it was.

"A box full of wombles."

And it was.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

On possibilities and practicalities

It's the season of hard rubbish collections, the time of the year during which Prudence finds herself conflicted.

On the one hand there are such treasures outside every second house, just waiting for a touch of love and creativity.

On the other, Prudence knows that, despite her best - and greenest - intentions, these objets will never truly know their true d'art nature.

Prudence, if she's honest with herself, just doesn't have the time, skill, motivation or tools to transform them.


The trucks come this week.

Meanings and other meanings

Lotto will never be the same.

Prudence has just found out that in Dutch, slikpik - the WA name for the letting the computer pick your numbers for you - means to suck penis.

Now she will have to work on not sniggering when asking for her weekly dose of misplaced hope.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Not underneath or on the other side

A document has found its way to Prudence's desk.

Instead of appendices - or even appendixes - it has appendages.

Prudence is fascinated.