Monday, October 31, 2011

In which Prudence goes, perhaps, a step too far

It's enough to make one clench one's teeth and utter an expletive under one's breath!

The local butcher, whom Prudence would like to patronise, as she believes in the sustainability of small business and the quality of his merchandise, can't spell.

Which in and of itself would be forgiveable if he were to correct his misspellings when these are gently and senstively pointed out by his clientele.

After three gentle and sensitive pointings-out, he still insisted on selling crapetto. Rather than the young goat known to gourmets the world over as capretto.

The fourth pointing-out occurred thus:

Butcher: Will that be all?

Prudence: Yes, thank you. And there is one thing you can do for me

Butcher: What's that?

Prudence: You can fix that sign that says crapetto. It should say capretto.

Butcher: Oh, yeah. We've had a few people say that.

Prudence: It's disrespectful and it makes you look like an idiot.

Butcher: (nervous giggle) Well, I can't spell vegetable and some other words either

Prudence: I'll help you.

Butcher: Are you always that harsh?

Prudence: I have pointed this out before. And I'd like to think you aren't an idiot.

Sigh. One wonders whether one can shop there again.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Not well brought up

Prudence is mortified.

Jodie the Kelpie can't swim.

She also gets quite nervous riding in the back of the ute.

A parlous state of affairs.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Extremist nut-casery. Which may be a tautology.

Prudence loves an unexpected extra.

At the Karagullen Horticultural Expo - her first visit - immediately on entering, a wild-eyed, grey-haired nana thrust a newspaper into her hands. Prudence, having been well brought up, thanked her politely and put it in her shopping bag.

Into the shopping bag went brochures on bee-keeping and fruit fly control, a promotional wooden spoon and other assorted bits and pieces.

Over tea and scones later, she examined the bag's contents. At the bottom was the newspaper - The New Citizen, the official publication of the Citizens Electoral Council. And what rich comedic material it provides!

The CEC nut-cases pop everywhere - acosting one at the train station, at the Royal Show, at farmers markets and school fetes and sometimes at the shops. They're conspiracy theorists at the far end of the madness spectrum.

The lead story claims Charles Darwin was a fraud, and blames him for the Global Financial Crisis, and implicates the Queen and Hitler.

Gold!

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Don't bother

Prudence loves a good art exhibition opening, so it was with excitement she went along to the joint opening of this and this.

And was heartily disappointed.

As well as a meandering speech by an Associate Professor of art mostly about the manufacture of locomotives overseas, and a cliche-ridden opening by the arts minister, one of the artists spoke.

Her first words were a double exhortation not to touch the works.

Which is an object lesson on how to insult and alienate your audience in less than a minute.

Prudence saw unmistakeable similarities to this book, and can't forgive the lack of canapes to soak up the cheap wine.